Just one of those days

YESTERDAY WAS JUST A BUMMER FOR ME. FOR NO PARTICULAR REASON, I FELT VERY DOWN AND WAS HAVING A PITY PARTY. I JUST DIDN'T LIKE THE WAY MY LIFE WAS PROGRESSING AND THE MORE I THOUGHT ABOUT IT THE WORSE I GOT. PETER REALLY TRIED TO GET ME OUT OF THIS BUT I JUST WOULDN'T HEAR OF ANY CHEER ME UP THINGS. I KNOW I HAVE A LOT OF THINGS GOING AND ITS GOING TO TAKE TIME TO GET THE JEWELRY BUSINESS OFF THE GROUND, EVEN THOUGH IT IS DOING BETTER THAN I HAVE EXPECTED.....

I JUST GOT OFF 2 (12 HOUR SHIFTS) THINGS AT WORK AS A NURSE AREN'T GOING VERY WELL AT ALL. I HAVE COME TO THE CONCLUSION THAT I AM GOING TO HAVE TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. EITHER TALK TO THE MATRON TO GET SOME OF THE THINGS FIXED OR GET ANOTHER JOB. I HATE TO CHANGE JOBS AT THIS TIME BUT I FEEL DREAD WHEN I GO INTO WORK ANYMORE. THAT'S A SIGN FOR ME THAT IT IS TIME TO DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT. I HAVEN'T HAD A RAISE IN 3 YEARS. THE OWNER IS VERY CHEAP AND SHE TRIES TO GET BY WITH A LOT. MAINLY NOT GIVING US A RAISE. I AM GOING TO BE ASKING THINGS FOR MYSELF BECAUSE THAT'S THE WAY THEY LIKE IT GO TO THEM INDIVIDUALLY. I HAVE WORKED MY ASS OFF FOR THESE PEOPLE AND ALL THEY CARE ABOUT IS MORE MONEY. CUT BACKS WHEN WE ARE DOWN ON PATIENTS THEN TAKE OFF TO NEW YORK CITY FOR VACATION. WE ARE ALL SUFFERING AND THEY ARE THE ONES GETTING THE MONEY OFF OUR MISERY, I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND PEOPLE LIKE THEM. OH I AM NOT SAYING THEY ARE BAD PEOPLE BUT THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS, THEY ARE CONCERN PEOPLE(TALKING ABOUT HE OWNER AND HER HUSBAND WHEN I SAY PEOPLE OR THEY) BUT WHEN IT COMES TO MONEY THEY LIKE IT TOO MUCH... SO I HAVE TO MAKE A CHANGE AND I HATE TO PUT IT TO THEM THIS WAY BUT IF SOME OF THE CHANGES DON'T HAPPEN I WILL HAVE TO GO FOR ANOTHER JOB.

SO I GUESS WITH ALL THIS BEING ON MY MIND, I GOT INTO A VERY BAD MOOD YESTERDAY AND COULDN'T GET MY HEAD AROUND IT. I HATE BEING PUT IN A CORNER. THAT'S WHAT I FEEL LIKE I AM BEING IN A CORNER WITH A DECISION TO FIGHT. I GUESS I WILL HAVE A TALK WITH HER ON MONDAY IF I CAN GET SOME TIME TO DO IT. I AM GETTING OLDER AND JUST CAN'T DO THE THINGS I USE TO WHEN I WAS YOUNGER. WE HAVE SOME HEAVY PATIENTS AND REALLY NEED MORE PEOPLE TO HELP WITH THESE BIG PEOPLE. WE HAVE LIFTS TO GE THEM OUT OF BED BUT IT GETTING THEM PULLED UP WHILE THEY ARE IN BED. WHEN I DO HAVE SOMEONE WITH ME SOME OF THEM JUST AREN'T GOOD LIFTERS THAT LEAVES ALL THE WORK UP TO ME AND MY BACK CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. SO IF SHE CAN'T GET GOOD LIFTERS SHE NEEDS TO HAVE THREE PEOPLE FOR THE SHIFT I WORK. MY BACK IS STILL NOT RIGHT SINCE I HAVE INJURED IT BACK IN JAN. OF THIS YEAR, IT GOES INTO SPASMS EVERY NOW AND THEN STILL GETS SORE WHEN I HAVE WORKED JUST ONE DAY. I WEAR A BACK SUPPORT(THAT I BOUGHT MYSELF) BUT STILL HAVE SPASMS. THEN WE HAVE TWO MENTAL PATIENTS THAT ARE DRIVING ME MENTAL. LOL AND BELIEVE ME I DON'T HAVE TO FAR TO GO. SO ITS A RAISE AND MORE PEOPLE TO WORK SO WE CAN TAKE CARE OF THE PATIENTS WE HAVE PROPERLY. THAT'S REALLY NOT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR, BUT FOR PEOPLE THAT LIKE THEIR MONEY I THINK IT'S GOING TO BE A PROBLEM. SO THAT'S THE DILEMMA I AM IN AT THE MOMENT AND IT IS MAKING ME IN A BAD MOOD FOR SOME REASON. I HATE IT WHEN I GET IN THESE MOODS.

PETER WOKE UP DOWN THIS MORNING AND I WAS IN A SOME WHAT BETTER MOOD, SO HE JUST STAYED AWAY FROM ME, SO WE WILL BE ABLE TO TALK ABOUT IT TOMORROW WHICH THAT'S THE WAY IT IS WITH US. WHEN HE WAS NOT ABLE TO GET ME IN A BETTER MOOD HIS MOOD CHANGED, THAT'S THE WAY I AM ALSO, SO WHEN WE BOTH GET OUT OF OUR MOODS THEN WE ARE ABLE TO TALK ABOUT IT. STRANGE BUT WE ARE CONNECTED SO EMOTIONAL TO ONE ANOTHER THAT ONE'S MOOD EFFECT ANOTHER IN A WAY THAT WE GET INTO A BAD MOOD ONCE THE ANOTHER ONE IS IN ONE, IF WE CAN'T GET THE OTHER PERSON OUT OF IT.

I REALLY HAVE TO GET THE PICS FROM MY PARTY AT THE PUB DOWNLOADED. WE HAVE ANOTHER PARTY ARRANGED FOR THIS COMING THURSDAY IN ANOTHER PUB IN THE VILLAGE CALLED NELLIE'S BAR. ITS RIGHT NEXT TO HENEY'S (WHERE WE HAD OUR PARTY LAST WEEK) WE REALLY DIDN'T WANT TO LEAVE HER OUT, BECAUSE SHE HAS REALLY BEEN VERY NICE TO ME SINCE I HAVE MOVED HERE. MOST OF THE PUBS WERE WE HAVE PARTIES DON'T CHARGE FOR THE ROOMS BECAUSE THEY FIGURE IT WILL BRING BUSINESS TO THE PUB....WELL PARTY ON GARTH.....LOL